Embracing Discomfort: Turning Anxiety into Action

I spent a lot of my life in the controlling, life-shrinking grip of anxiety.

Nervous tics in elementary school. Full-blown panic attacks in my late teens that made even leaving the house feel like a heroic act. Anxiety was the defining characteristic that shaped the earliest years of my life.

That’s why I’m proud — not of having “eliminated” it (because I haven’t) — but of learning how to tame it, live with it and to build a bigger life in spite of it.

Even now, with all I know and teach about embracing change, there are still moments — especially right before a new challenge— where the old sensations stir. The body tightens. The mind starts making its case for safety. For delay. For distraction.

For me, anxiety shows up as a pit in the stomach. A tingling at the back of the head. And, if it’s strong enough, silence — the sudden inability to speak.

You might experience it as restlessness. Racing thoughts. A need to plan more. Or a quiet internal whisper of not yet.

This is more than resistance. It’s anxiety — not always clinical, and deeply human.And if you’re on the edge of a meaningful change — in your work, your habits, your relationships, your identity — I want you to hear this:

Discomfort is not a detour. It’s not a demon to slay. In my experience, it’s a doorway. This is the path to your next level of freedom, growth, and personal power.

The Biology of Discomfort

Let’s start with a simple truth: your brain is doing exactly what it was designed to do.

The amygdala, a small almond-shaped structure in the brain, scans your environment 24/7 for danger. It doesn’t differentiate between a real bear in the woods and a tough conversation, a new business launch, or your boss walking toward your desk. To your nervous system, change = risk.

Research from the NeuroLeadership institute, (where I completed my most recent coaching certification), shows that the body’s response to social threats or self-doubt mirrors how it reacts to physical danger: your heart rate spikes, your muscles tense, your critical thinking narrows.

Here’s the good news:Discomfort is not a stop sign, but it is a signal.And how you interpret that signal — how you respond following that initial flash of perceived threat — shapes what happens next.

The Discomfort Zone Is Where Growth Begins

“Comfort zone” gets tossed around often in personal development circles, but in coaching, we go further.

We get curious about the discomfort zone — not as a place to avoid, but as a place to explore. To practice. To become more fluent in.

Research has shown that people who intentionally engaged in moderately uncomfortable experiences — like learning a new skill or initiating a vulnerable conversation — not only grew faster, but were more satisfied with their progress.

Discomfort isn’t the cost of change. It’s often the catalyst.

Turning Discomfort into Forward Motion

So how do we move through discomfort into action — without getting overwhelmed, paralyzed, or burned out?

Here are three practices that have helped me transition life-limiting anxiety into a minor, manageable signal:

1. Name it without shame.

Anxiety thrives in ambiguity. Name what you’re feeling. “I’m anxious because I’m doing something new.” That simple sentence alone can reduce its intensity. Labeling emotional states has been shown in MRI studies to shift brain activity from the amygdala – the oldest and most primitive, threat-scanning part of the brain we discussed earlier, to the prefrontal cortex — the most evolved part of the brain responsible for planning and reasoning.

2. Reframe the energy.

Physiologically, anxiety and excitement look nearly identical. According to Harvard researcher Alison Wood Brooks, simply saying “I’m excited” instead of “I’m nervous” can improve performance. Try this: When the anxiety comes, ask yourself: What if this is energy for change? What am I excited about? Then — and this really works — put on a big smile. Your brain follows your face and you move from a threat to an opportunity mindset.

3. Rethink the step, not the dream.

Big goals trigger big feelings. Instead of shrinking your ambition, shrink the next step. Send the email. Make the list. Have the conversation. These micro-actions signal progress to your nervous system — and create what I call a “win state.” Over time, these wins stack into momentum and create your History of Success.

Discomfort Isn’t the Enemy — It’s Evidence You’re Engaged

In my practice, I coach women through inflection points — those moments when life feels ready to change. Not because something is broken, but because something deeper is waking up.

They’re not lost. They’re aware. And that awareness can feel disorienting.

But discomfort, when held with care and curiosity, is a kind of wisdom. It’s your internal system responding to the weight of what matters.

The question isn’t: How do I eliminate anxiety? It’s: Can I hold space for it, walk with it, and keep moving anyway?

One of the tools I often recommend is Tara Brach’s RAIN practice — an accessible, powerful framework for sitting with difficult emotions. Whether it’s fear, shame, or hesitation, RAIN teaches you how to recognize, allow, investigate,and nurture the feelings that come up. It’s worth learning. You can start here.

A Thoughtful Reframe

If you’re standing at the edge of something new — a big change, a quiet shift, a season of becoming — consider this:

• Your anxiety doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means you’re stretching.

• Your fear doesn’t mean stop. It means pay attention.

• Discomfort isn’t an obstacle. It’s a compass — showing you where to lean in and make space.

  
  

This is the work I support women through — learning how to live in motion, with clarity and courage, even when the path ahead is uncertain.

Because when you learn to partner with your discomfort — not fight it, not fear it — something remarkable happens:

You start to trust yourself not just in ease, but in the fire of growth.And that’s where real change begins.

If you’re ready to step into change with support, care, and high-quality tools — I am here to help. My coaching practice offers offering individual and group coaching for motivated women ready to make their move.

Note: This post refers to “lowercase-a” anxiety — the kind we all encounter when we stretch or grow. If you are experiencing clinical anxiety, please seek the help of a trained mental health professional. Coaching and therapy are powerful partners, but I am only certified to do one of these.