Coach Sara: My Why Not

I’ll let you in on a (not-so-secret?) secret about me: I’ve never been much for social media... until very recently. Despite living in the digital age of 2025 and having had all the tools at my disposal for over a decade, social media never appealed to me.

Maybe it’s because I’m firmly planted on the Gen X side of my Xennial identity, but I grew up valuing privacy and anonymity. Showing off or seeking attention? That wasn’t my style.

Last week, I wrote about my 'why': the deeply personal, values-driven reasons that motivate my work. Your 'why' is crucial—it’s what keeps you grounded when challenges arise and the going gets tough.

But there’s another side of the equation that doesn’t get nearly enough attention: your 'why not.'

For me, social media is the ultimate 'why not.' I don’t like it, and I don’t know how to use it well. Every day feels like a learning curve that places me outside my comfort zone. Making videos and posting updates comes with a flood of questions: Am I in the frame right? Too close or too far away? Am I making sense? Talking too fast? Can I really not wear makeup, or do I need to change this part of my routine? Then there’s the ever-elusive hashtag strategy: how many is too many? (Is it like flair? Is 15 the minimum, but I should be aiming for 37?) 

It’s not just discomfort—it’s a social-logistical minefield! But I’ve realized that if I want to reach the people who need to find this work and benefit from the communities we’re building, I have to figure it out. Discomfort can be a sign that the efforts you’re undertaking are misaligned to your values and not the right ones. So, it’s important to recognize that nothing here violates my core values. This is run-of-the-mill resistance demonstrating a bias for same-ness, and it’s more than fair game to push past that!

Here’s the thing about stepping outside your comfort zone: it’s where growth happens.

By leaning into the uncomfortable, I’ve found something surprising: dang, if the whole thing isn’t growing on me! The very thing I once dreaded is becoming something I actually enjoy. I’m learning new skills, connecting in ways I never expected, and—best of all—reconnecting with my first love: writing. I haven’t written a blog in many years, and honestly, I forgot how much I love engaging this way with other people, the world and ideas. 

So yes, hold tight to your 'why.' It will be your guide when things get tough. But don’t forget to also push and find your 'why not.' It’s in those uncharted spaces—where discomfort meets curiosity—that you’ll discover just how much you’re capable of. Together, they’re the yin and yang of transformation: one rooting your feet to the ground, the other letting your dreams take flight.