How are Those Resolutions Coming? Making Changes that Stick

This week I spent time building community with a group enjoying great food and drinks. I encountered more than one person whose “Dry January” pledge had shifted to a “Damp January” over the course of the evening. Not surprising at this time of year – many a resolution finds it’s end with a whimper and not a bang in mid-January. So what’s the reason so many people abandon their resolutions, and what’s the recipe for a successful, sustainable change?  

In the latest episode of my podcast, Range of Change, we dove into some powerful topics about lifestyle shifts, making changes that stick, and the importance of community. Erica shared how her transition to a vegan lifestyle wasn’t just about adopting a new diet; it was a profound shift in mindset, one that was supported by a community of like-minded individuals. This community not only provided knowledge and up-skilling, it encouraged her during challenging moments and also helped her remain accountable to her new goals. 

The role of community in facilitating change cannot be overstated. When Erica talked about her vegan journey, it was clear that having a knowledgeable, inspiring network helped her navigate the inevitable challenges of navigating such a significant transformation. Change is hard on its own, but it's even harder without people who understand and encourage you. Whether it’s a coach, a group of likeminded people, or a close friend, having someone—or a whole group of them—to partner with for accountability makes all the difference. They help you stay grounded in your “WHY”, celebrate small victories, and lift you up when things don’t go as planned. Accountability is the bridge that connects intention to action. It is more than someone to feel responsible to report out to; it is someone to partner on a plan and the best check-ins to stay on course. Finding the right people to walk alongside you is critical. But what happens when the change doesn’t stick, and failure becomes part of the story?

I’ll be honest— I’ve been reflecting on this in my own journey, where I’ve learned the hard way that simply deciding to change isn’t enough. Last year I decided to follow a plant-based diet. I embarked on this change, like Erica described for herself, primarily for health reasons while also strongly influenced by empathetic and environmental ones as well. I wasn’t as prepared as I thought I was, though, and my health indicators went in the opposite direction after a year on the diet. I would have benefited not only from additional research and enlisting the help of professionals to understand the nutritional impacts of this decision, but also a partner to help collaboratively define a comprehensive set of goals with more frequent measurements.

It’s easy to feel like I failed, especially when I see others, like Erica, succeeding. But the truth is, the process of change isn’t linear. There are setbacks, mistakes, and moments where you question whether it’s even worth it. I’m sure many of you have experienced this too: that frustration of trying something and realizing it didn’t stick, despite your best intentions.

Unlike Erica, who found immediate success with her plant-based journey, my first attempt at making a similar lifestyle shift fell short of achieving my health goals. But what I’ve come to realize is that failure doesn’t have to be the end of the story. Instead, it’s an opportunity to reflect and learn. I’m actively doing the work now—bridging the gaps in my knowledge and understanding of what went wrong, and dedicating time to learn what will be most healthy to address my unique needs.

I am moving forward with more intention, seeking the right resources and support, and committing to continuous growth.

Making change isn’t just about knowing what to do—it’s about deeply understanding why we do it, what motivates us at our core and aligning our actions to those deeply held beliefs and motivators. And critically, it’s about understanding how our resistance shows up and being prepared for the obstacles along the way. And when we encounter those obstacles, it’s about leaning into our community and holding ourselves accountable to the process.

So, thinking about your resolutions - whether you’re looking to overhaul your diet, navigate a career change, or simply become more intentional about your lifestyle - if you've tried and had a setback, remember that it's not about the failure; it’s about what you do next. If you are trying to go it alone, perhaps it’s time to find your community, ask yourself if you can be more open-minded to new information, and never underestimate the power of partnering with a like-minded partner for help with accountability. 

The truth is, lasting change happens when we stop trying to do it alone and start doing it together, with the right support and knowledge in place.

So, let’s keep going, keep learning, and keep leaning on the community that will help us get where we want to be. The journey may take time, but it’s worth it.